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Oh dear. Not only are the Spurs first team suffering their worst start to a top flight season since the year the Titanic went down, their ladies side are struggling too . . .

1 Luton Town LFC 8 21
2 Welwyn Garden City LFC 8 21
3 Enfield Town LFC 7 16
4 Lewes LFC 6 15
5 Wellingborough Diamonds LFC 7 12
6 Norwich City Ladies FC 7 9
7 Northampton Town LFC 7 7
8 Gillingham LFC 7 5
9 Cambridge City LFC 7 3
10 Tottenham Hotspur LFC 7 3
11 Bedford Town Bells LFC 7 2

[SIZE="1"]League position/ team/ played/ points
Women's combination South East league[/SIZE]

Apparently it happened as the result of a misunderstanding when Playboy offered Colleen £100000 to shave her twat.