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Connemara 2010 - The Connemarathon
A Running Commentary adventure

A start is born.
Reflections on our weekend in Ireland to follow here.

[Image: 25889_1381626094716_1053853244_1116772_6850736_n.jpg]
Mile 13 - starting point for the full marathon.

(damn, I've started. Now I'll have to get my finger out)
Standing on my own
It didn't mean that much to me
I thought I had it all
I didn't see the mystery
I stood the test of time
I took the step to find
Love's great adventure


Ultravox, Love’s Great Adventure

Before leaving home I’d not really given a lot of thought to the race.
We’d booked flights, hotels, hire cars, entered the race ... it was all there on various pieces of paper. I’d contacted Ray O’Connor, the affable, well-organised Connemarathon Race Director, two weeks before raceday asking to upgrade from the half (13.1 miles) to the Ultra (39.3 miles). My 'training had gone well' I explained. He replied to say that the request was so unusual he would allow it – and that was that. It never really dawned on me that I was going to run a half marathon through the western Irish hills, only to follow that up with a full marathon through those same dramatic, ultimately ball-busting undulations. It was all happening to somebody else, and I watched it all unfold with a morbid fascination.

Sat in the pub in Oughterard with SP, Down-In-one, El Gordo, M, Suzie Q and fellow Ultranista Antonio on Saturday night the penny finally dropped, a dull thud in the back of my head followed by the tinny rattle one hears when a spun coin reaches it’s death-throws. I sat, unusually quiet, whilst SP drowned his pasta in salt (thinking it was pepper) before brazenly demanding a fresh plate. He was deeply offended by the absence of an ‘S’ or a ‘P’ (we should all have monogrammed utensils I feel) on the condiment pots and the ubiquitous use of a single aperture. ‘Clearly everyone knows that salt has one hole and pepper has three’ he wailed, genuinely upset, across a backdrop of embarrassed tittering and the sound of dropped jaws striking wood. All this played out before me like a theatrical production. It wasn’t real, any of it.

The day before we’d landed in Dublin where Down-In-One, urgently seeking an airport exit through which to indulge her nicotine habit, did her best to get us arrested by bursting trolley-first through sealed security doors. The wailing sirens receded as we executed the fastest nonchalant stroll in history. SP and EG, having secured the hire cars from some far-flung depot, pulled up at the arrivals point. We piled in and struck out for Dublin’s fair city. Two hours later we’d checked into our swanky city centre hotel (having managed to slalom through a vibrant throng of French rugby fans) and located a friendly ‘local’. The Guinness was devine. We tested pint after pint yet failed to find even one less then entirely quaffable.

In keeping with the surreal nature of my own trip I announced (in what seemed to me like someone else’s voice) my need to obtain new running shoes before Sunday. This intention to break yet another of distance running's commandments drew concern from my companions. To me it was simple; my trusty road-runners were tatty, old and battered with well over 600 miles on them. I needed maximum cushioning for my duel with the unforgiving road, ergo new shoes required.
'You've thrown the rule-book out of the window' quipped SP.
I never had a rule-book. I find them at best a guide but often misleading and, in the main, too general to be of use to individuals. Religious adhesion to detailed strictures of others distracts from what one must do to overcome an apparently insurmountable challenge: take dead aim. I have the late, great Harvey Penick to thank for that. A wrinkled brown berry of a man of whom it's been said if one poured a bucket of water over his head not a drop would reach the ground, Penick wrote several books containing stories and principals that he felt were fundamental to succes in golf, in sport and in life. Like George Sheehan he believed in individuality, that we are all 'an experiement of one'. One of his principals I've leaned on is 'take dead aim'. Work out what you need to do, focus on that and don't let anyone or anything break your concentration. Harvey wasn't my only mentor on the road to Connemara, but he was certainly a very important one.

After a brief and fruitless meander through a central shopping precinct we set off for Temple Bar, the infamous quadrant of Dublin 'blessed' with any number of Irish theme pubs pumping out diddly-dee music and Guinness in equal measure. The floor of the pub we chose was awash with spilled beer and broken glass. I guess Temple Bar ‘had to be done’, yet in spite of the continued quality of the Black Nectar both EG and I couldn’t wait to get back to a more relaxed and altogether less contrived environment.

On Saturday morning I took breakfast in the hotel. An array of fried meats bathed sweatily under vicious sunlamps. Bowls of beans and trays of greasy fried eggs nestled alongside softly simmering tomatoes. All around us the French rugby legion, supporters of Claremont Ferrant, sat quietly contemplating their sides’ narrow loss (by a single point) to Leinster the night before. Zut alors! Les Miserables mumbled and grumbled thier discontent as they busily filled baguettes for the long journey home. Based on the body language I suppose you’d call this gathering a shrug of Frenchmen. I almost felt sorry for them.

I left the RC gang munching on toast and struck out with SP towards a running shop I’d tracked down on the web. This I knew (having called last night) stocked shiny new Mizunos UK12. I’ve worn Mizunos for many years and had no doubt (provided there was no radical change in design) that I’d be fine in them on Sunday. Sure enough the new boots were as a glass slipper to Cinderella (OK, after a night in Dublin with SP Ugly Sister is more apt. According to legend the shoe didn’t fit them so it doesn’t really work. Oh, please yourselves). I picked up a couple of fruit-based Powerbars before plundering Tesco for bananas, bagels, bottled water, coca cola, margarine, jam and malt loaf. Along with Jelly Babies this formed my supplies for the assault on the Connemara mountains; fuel of the running gods. Fully laden I toddled back to the hotel where Team RC were waiting, eager to hit the road.
Valid point about the new shoes. So long as you're using a tried and tested brand and model, and they didn't give you problems last time, then they should work straight out of the box, as it were. You can see why the received wisdom is good advice for less experienced runners, though.

Great stuff so far... is it going to be a monthly serial?
(11-05-2010 07:41 AM)Sweder Wrote: [ -> ]The irony is I've waited a full month only to dash this thing off in my usual helter-skelter, slap-dash manner in mere minutes.

It's worth the wait...Wink
Ho yes, worth the wait! I've just read instalment 1 whilst sipping a very fine unspellable single malt at the end of a long day. Great work Sweder - I really am looking forward to the next ripping episode!
To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come


Hamlet, William Shakespeare

We loaded our wagons and, after a slightly embarrassing SatNav failure that took us around the block and back to the hotel, our small yet perfectly-formed convoy bade farewell to the streets of the Republic’s Capital. Saturday was illuminated by clear skies and strong sunshine. By eleven am the temperature was a heady sixteen degrees Celsius and rising. Not perhaps a match for the surface of the sun or even a chilly day in Almeria, yet it sent paradoxical shivers down my spine. Just how warm might it be out there in the sheltered western hills?

Riding shotgun I hogged the iPod, feeding a cocktail of rock and blues through the car speakers via a clever tuner widget I’d brought along. SP remained good natured despite the lack of a Seventies disco soundtrack. I soothed his musical sensitivities for the next two hours with a carefully selected blend of early, bluesy Zeppelin and a generous helping of Stevie Ray Vaughan.

Our first port of call: the Courtyard Marriott in Galway City, home to Race Registration. Here we’d collect our race numbers and, according to the instructions (downloaded off the ‘net by the fastidious Antonio) details of what to expect on the day: bus timetables, bag drop info, race start protocols, race briefing for Ultra runners, water station locations. The mystery of the mythical mile-drop supply bins would be revealed at the briefing. Each Ultra runner could submit three bags/ receptacles, choosing a ‘bin’ for each bag. These bins would be discharged at predetermined mile markers for runners to collect their provisions en route. It all sounded a bit tricky to me.

Wandering into the hotel lobby we found ourselves amongst what appeared to be a lost tribe of uber-humans. Long-limbed critters with impossibly flat torsos, lean tanned faces wreathed in easy smiles mounted on muscular necks, they looked for all the world like runners from another planet. We stood out like sore, slightly portly thumbs, interlopers hot off the bus from Carbville (with apologies to SuzieQ and M). Ultra runners I thought as a layer of my 'self-denial' armour evaporated. The reality of the task ahead began to take shape. We climbed the stairs to level one and entered a circuitous lobby. More beaming lithe people clad in trackies and t-shirts offered colourful flyers for future events. After walking this gentle gauntlet we found ourselves back in the stairwell, numberless and confused. Up another level we found race registration. I shuffled towards a trestle table, drawn forward by a pair of soft brown eyes above a beautiful welcoming smile.
‘Ultra?’
I felt myself nod, slowly.
‘Good man yerself! Ya must be mad!’
I grinned, a twisted, involuntary stretching of the skin around my mouth that felt like a grimace. Giving my name felt rather like checking in at the gallows. The charming young lady handed over a large envelope. I strolled away, sliding out a sheath of papers. Race number, more instructions and a large, easy-to-read self-adhesive bag-drop tag. As I dithered about behind the tables I spied a willowy fellow in a Connemarathon polo shirt. This turned out to be Ray O’Connor. I introduced myself, eagerly shaking his hand and, from somewhere deep within, thanked him profusely for allowing me to run three times my originally planned distance.
‘You’re only the second person to ask that’ he grinned, kindly refraining from any worried glances at the personal Guinness depot lounging above my waistband.
I’d dressed carefully, donning my Two Oceans finishers’ shirt as much to convince myself as others that I was capable of covering more than the distance to the nearest buffet.
‘It’s going to be a hot one.' A furrow appearing across his forehead, easy smile retracting behind a look that could crack granite.
‘There’s a marathon going on out there today. I hear it’s brutal.’
Not the fillip I was looking for, but I smiled back and muttered something like ‘better than getting cold and wet’.
‘Oh yes’ he agreed. ‘But then we’re all used to that.’

Having received quite enough encouragement I caught up with Suzie Q in the merch area. She was making eyes at a fetching black zip-up jacket emblazoned with the race logo above the word ‘Ultra’. She tried it on and, perhaps swayed by my purrs of admiration, parted with a small wad of Euros. Antonio joined us, head stuffed in his race-pack, tone quizzical. ‘There’s no finishers shirt in here.' With everyone duly signed up (Antonio, still remarkably sanguine, confirmed with me for the long one, SP, Suzie & EG confirmed for the half) we saddled up and rode out into the west. Our destination was causing me some trouble. Or at least the name was. Oughterard, pronounced, so far as I could make out, Or-Ter-Rard. Whenever I tried to say it I got it wrong, to the initial amusement and increasing frustration of my companions. Perhaps subliminally I didn’t want to get there, for that would mean another tranche of facade removed and the race, so long a hazy mirage on a never-to-be-reached horizon, would be all too close and alarmingly real.

Our own Ops Centre turned out to be a gem. Unearthed by the meticulous El Gordo on a previous visit the hotel had just been renovated to a good standard. The receptionist informed us there’d be a short delay as our rooms were ‘prepared’. I had visions of decorators applying a frantic final coat of paint but I needn’t have worried. It was after three pm. With luggage stowed in the foyer we set off to explore the town. It took no more than a dozen steps to find a pub, and before you could say ‘mine’s a pint’ we were into the Guinness. The dark ale was as good as (and a good deal cheaper than) in Dublin and we took full advantage. To SP’s unconcealed delight we had not one but two pubs aligned sequentially next to our hotel, another opposite and yet another within a feeble stone's throw.

At some point we returned to check in. Our rooms were named intriguingly. Mine was ‘Exotic’, one letter away from potential paradise. Each was themed vaguely in line with its title, mine adorned with faux 1920’s travel chests and a pine wardrobe, light, airy decor in keeping with the balmy spring weather usually associated with the Caribbean. I shut the door and unpacked my supplies. The coke needed to be flattened (de-fizzed) for the race so I gathered up all available beakers and cups which I filled with the noisy black muck so as to decarbonate overnight. For a moment I worried that a cleaner might come in and empty the lot down the sink; then I remembered where we were and the fact that time moves a good deal slower in these parts. We’d be lucky if we saw a cleaner by the end of the week. Next I began constructing peanut butter and strawberry jam bagels, dividing them into what I hoped would be manageable segments before wrapping them in toilet paper. This would prove troublesome later on but here in the cool calm of my lovely room, a convivial swell of Guinness swaying in my belly, I felt buoyed by what felt like meticulous preparation. I stood back to admire the array of goodies before the solemn ritual of pinning my race number to my RC shirt. I planned to take a change of shirt (more evidence of skilful planning) to combat the sartorial ugliness of plodding for hours under a blazing sun. Only now did I realise I’d have to do something clever with the race number. This kind of strategic thinking required lubrication, so I retired to the bar where I found my colleagues discussing more pressing matters: dinner.

After much deliberation we decided to eat in the hotel. This brings us back to the pre-race pasta meal and the SP S&P debacle. He took a lot of ribbing over that – rightly in my opinion – but the big fellow stood his ground and got a replacement dish. The boisterous chatter subsided as a combination of travel and waning excitement took its inevitable toll. One by one our party drifted off to bed, and I too tottered up that wooden hill.

To sleep, perchance to dream ...
Good gear Sweder, keep it coming!

Thumb
Where is the next bit? I'm on pins here waiting to read the grizzly running saga.
Fail to prepare, prepare to fail
Roy Keane (with apologies to Benjamin Franklin)

... what dreams may come

What dreams indeed. Such visions I had, tossing and turning in my ale-fuelled flop-sweat. Sleep-addled thoughts swam through my head like creatures from the deep. No longer was this race some idle future fantasy. It was right here, or at least just around the corner. Time to don my battle-armour and face The Beast.

I felt certain I’d complete the 62 kilometres, come rain, shine or, as it turned out, unseasonal warmth. Just as Feet In The Clouds left me feeling I could run up a mountain, so Born To Run had convinced me that lack of training and extra weight notwithstanding I could eat up those 39 some-odd miles within the seven and a half hour limit and live to tell the tale. The book tells the incredible story of the Tarahumara Indians, of the power of chia and old tyre shoes, of greed, avarice, man’s inhumanity to his fellow man, of breathtaking, mind-blowing long-distance running through some of the most inhospitable terrain on the planet. I won’t bang on; just read it. Beg, borrow, purchase or purloin a copy and ‘get in amongst it’. It deals with barefoot running and biomechanics, subjects close to my own feet.

Now, in the deathly quiet of my hotel room, advice from those pages flickered across my slowly waking synapses.
Pace yourself ... bend your knees ... keep a straight back ... hydrate ... watch your form, calorie in-take ... relax; enjoy the ride ....
Eventually the sun peeped over the horizon, the inky blackness outside my window softening as daybreak leaked blue into the sky. I busied about the room, re-canting flat(ish) Coke (a rather messier process than I’d envisaged), checking and re-checking everything, indulging my inner runner’s OCD. My running bottle contained a weak Robinsons blackcurrant mix. My Garmin sat on the sideboard, fully charged. I strapped it on; one less thing to forget. I loaded two rucksacks; one I’d trained with, a threadbare purple LA Fitness freebie, the other a newer item on loan from SP. I planned to plant these in the mile bins at Race HQ – mile 13 for my grotty old pack, mile 22 for SP's shiny new model. Each contained water, bananas, segmented bagels, powerbars, malt loaf (sliced and buttered), Jelly Babies and ibuprofen. The first also held my clean(ish) Two Oceans technical shirt, a half-used tub of vaseline, a 'little something' from Suzie Q (of which more later) and my iPhone; the second contained the flat coke, a portable re-charging unit for my iPhone, a fresh pair of socks and my old running shoes (just in case). I glanced at my watch: almost seven.

Downstairs Antonio and SP (who’d eschewed a lie-in to see us off) loitered near the breakfast room. There was movement in the kitchen and a swarthy young chap in a horribly stained chef’s outfit asked if we’d like some porridge. Yes please! He wandered off and I wondered if we might be scuppered by the laid-back nature of our hosts. The Ultra buses were due to sweep through town on route to race HQ (and our not-to-be-missed briefing) at 07:30 sharp. Happily the (excellent) porridge arrived in great steaming bowls, was swiftly adorned with bananas and honey and wolfed down in double-quick time. SP waved us off and for a moment, despite Antonio standing alongside me, I felt horribly alone.

The buses were prompt. We boarded ours at 07:32 to find it was the third of the four to pass this way. Perched quietly at the back I drank in the heady cocktail of excited chatter and freshly-applied Ralgex as we traversed the narrow winding lanes to Maam Cross. Race HQ hotel sat at a crossroads next to an apparently abandoned Esso garage. In the briefing room the pre-race cacophony grew as runners busied themselves, checking clothing, re-jigging Camelbacks, adjusting shoes, packing bags for the mile-drop bins and generally fussing about. I learned to my horror that bags dropped in the bins must be taken on the run or discarded, forcing a hurried change of plan. SP’s rucksack was a good quality vessel. I wasn’t going to trade it for mine as I’d trained with mine and found it most comfortable, vital on such a long, difficult journey. I juggled the contents, loading SP’s pack with my clothes for the bag drop. There were no other bags for me to use for my second bin drop so I had to improvise. My own rucksack went into the Mile 13 bin as planned. This would allow me to run the first 13 miles carrying only my waterbelt, a few Jelly Babies and a single pack of Malt Loaf slices. I was left with the flat coke, some energy bars, extra ibuprofen, a banana and my old runners. If I packed that lot into my 13 mile bag I'd be carrying a lot of gear for the best part of a marathon, hardly ideal. Then, a moment of inspiration. I crammed as much of the excess material as I could into the decrepit shoes, tied the laces together and dumped them into the Mile 22 bin. Job done.

Ray hopped up onto a table and called for quiet. He delivered his pre-race briefing in a calm, serious manner. Conditions were expected to be brutal with temperatures due in the 20’s © with little to no cooling breeze. Hydration was key, and anyone remotely in distress would be removed from the course for their own well-being. If anyone needed sobering up at this point Ray’s soliloquy provided the perfect metaphorical slap. I managed to capture some of his intro via AudioBoo:

Listen!
Ray's voice is soft and gentle - earphones suggested for best listening

One story I didn’t record (and which drew the biggest laugh) referred to last years’ race. Standing at the finish line Ray had been approached by a little old lady who’d just completed the half. She thanked him profusely for all the ‘lovely gifts laid out for the runners' along the way. She was of course referring to the Ultra runners’ provisions, set out on trestle tables next to the water stations. I was glad I’d decided to make 22 miles my last drop, thus avoiding any sharp-eyed magpies in the final third.

After leaving our gear at the bag drop (the Esso shop) we boarded the buses once more. I sat at the back as Antonio paired up with the Italian fellow who’d been singled out in the briefing. Alone with my thoughts I observed the pre-run rituals going on around me. A wiry chap next to me kicked off his shoes and socks, wiggling his toes as if to infuse them with chilled calm. Another loosened his laces, yet another slurped nervously from a half-empty water bottle. Vaseline was daubed hither and thither, a timely reminder for me to grease my own nipples. The unmistakable stench of Deep Heat stung my nostrils. In contrast the raucous banter softened to a gentle murmur as pre-race nerves took hold, yet I felt no anxiety. My strategy relied on the need to say calm, blind faith in my recently-adapted running style (based on economy of effort and an upright stance) and the daily consumption of a handful of chia seeds mixed with water and lemon to create a daily energy drink bearing a striking resemblance to frogspawn. I could feel the buzz of the occasion tingling in my fingertips and I tried to relax, drawing in slow, deep breaths as the most fabulous countryside sped by. Here, nestled in the deserted cleveage of impressively craggy hills, we few, just two hundred and three souls, would in a few minutes embark upon an epic journey. We would find out more about ourselves in the next few hours than many might wish to. We'd face our fears; the heat, the road, fatigue, dark moments of self-doubt gnawing at our weary bones. Even in the knowledge that I’d be sorely tested I felt calm; I would succeed, even though I had no reasonable right to expect success.

The buses pulled over to the side of a narrow road. Runners spilled out onto the verge, knee-deep in bleached-blond grass, blinking in the untrammelled sunlight. Several peeled off to pee along the fence-line. A group of ladies rock-hopped up a slope to find a less public spot in which to take relief. Antonio busied himself, taking photos up and down the road. He too seemed relaxed, unfased by the challenge before us. Ahead the racers gathered at what appeared to be the starting point, a bend in the road. Expectation hung hot and heavy in the crisp morning air, the fields around us impossibly still as the clock ticked around to nine am. Antonio and I loitered at the back, stretching gently whilst gazing across the landscape towards the great grey shoulders hunched over the Hell of the West, the heartbreaking two mile ascent before the final blessed drop to the finish back at Maam Cross. It seemed a lifetime away.

And then, before I could think of a thing to say, it was time.

[Image: 4513991530_fb480745e4.jpg]
!
'Get your Race Head on'
Andy Lynam

Two Hundred souls lined up along the otherwise deserted road from Teernakill to Maam Cross, a colourful collection of generally athletic folk dressed in vests, shirts, jackets, hats, back-packs and ration belts, each person bearing the yellow Connemarathon Ultra Marathon race number. The starter reminded us that for the first thirteen miles we’d share the road with traffic. If compelled to venture too far off the hard-top we’d ‘like as not sink up to your waists in devilish peat-bog.’ With that stinging valediction ringing in our ears he sent us on our way.

As we shuffled towards the chip mats, conspicuous reddish-brown strips laid across a carriageway riddled with pot-holes, I took stock. The sun felt warm and welcoming on my face. My water belt sat snug around my middle, chew bars trapped under the left side, wrapped Malt Loaf slices wedged on the right, iPhone nestling in the centre like a flat black Joey peering from my paunch. The gentle sloshing of my drink and the rhythmic slap-slap of shoes on tarmac formed our soundtrack as we got this big ball rolling. Our Rap-Master DJ was an American, a staggeringly verbose reptilian blue-blood who I shall hence forth refer to as 'The Lizard' in homage to the slavering fiends in HST's Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas. Of ample stature he was dressed in a shiny blue top, chino shorts and full-length flesh-coloured tights, the sort you might see on low-rent dancing girls or beneath a tight leather microskirt strolling along the docks in Nice. He delivered an endless stream of (mostly) harmless commentary, freely imparting advice to all and sundry on what not to do on such a long, testing race. Listen to twats like you sprang uncharitably to mind but, being British (and by default polite in the company of strangers) I buttoned my lip. Aware that a number of us were staring at his shiny nylon-clad legs he explained that the tights were his 'unique way' of dealing with a variety of 'career-threatening' ailments. It sounded like a lame apology for blatant transvestism to me, but hey; each to his own.

I needed to focus on my running style from the off, essential if I was to get round in reasonable shape. I leant into a comfortable, upright stance, holding my upper body still whilst moving with an economy of effort to make the Tarahumara ... well, giggle frankly. As El Gordo would say I was 'getting my Ultra Head on'; setting the parameters for the next few hours, priming my body for the challenge of a long, hot run. I sipped from my water bottle and nibbled on Jelly Babies to keep my digestive system active. Jog Shop Sam once told me that eating early on a long run is essential to maintain blood-flow around the gut. Fail to start right and your body diverts resources to your hungry cardio-vascular furnace and hard-working motor muscles leaving the stomach in stasis, unable to cope when eventually fuel is taken on board. One of my favourite quotes from Born to Run - ‘Ultras are just eating and drinking contests with a little exercise thrown in’ - became part of my mantra, reminding me to refuel and hydrate at regular intervals. Ultra running is the ultimate moveable feast.

Antonio dropped back, leaving me alone with my new best mate as he chatted gently with some of our fellow tail-enders. A handful had stayed with us, similarly focused on starting slowly, easing into what for most would be a very long hot day on the road. The peloton pulled away like a train in an old movie, leaving our disconnected carriage to roll along under its own momentum. After a series of corners they were gone. Slap-slap, slosh-slosh, blather-blather, the early miles ticked by. A light sheen of sweat coated my brow, kissed by the cool morning breeze as I tried not to think about how easy this felt and wonder when it was going to start to hurt.

Amidst his limitless tales of deeds of daring do the Lizard dropped a bombshell. Ever since I’d thought about taking on the Ultra I’d planned to take regular walk-breaks to conserve energy and re-fuel carefully (ie without spilling stuff all down my shirt). My training, such as it was, included several runs at seven-minute kilometre pace, taking one-minute walk breaks every ten minutes or so. Now we were into the race proper no-one else in our group was doing this and, considering we were in the best (coolest) part of the day, I changed strategy. What I heard next confirmed my decision.

‘Yep, I'll be happy to reach twenny-six miles in under faav Aars.’
To this point I’d deployed a sort of teenage grunt by way of propping up my half of the ‘conversation’. Hardly polite I suppose but infinitely better for all concerned than, say, shoving the fellow into a ditch. Probably.
‘Hmm? Five hours you say? Well, yes, that would be great.’
‘Boy you BETTER be through the marathon in faav or less else they’ll throw your ass in the sweeper wagon!’
‘What? There’s a mid-way cut-off?’
‘Yup. Beat the clock or your ass is grass and they’re a lawn-mower’ He chuckled horribly, clearly pleased with his well-used punch-line.
Damn, I must’ve missed that. The timing didn’t worry me unduly; I felt capable of running the marathon in under five hours, perhaps even leave something in the tank, yet this rather strict deadline left little wriggle-room. I plugged away, letting the road rise and fall gently as we wound our way westward toward Athry. As the sun warmed my back I wondered just how hot things were likely to get.

Just past Boheesha a couple of run-walkers came into view. We reeled them in, exchanging greetings as we drew alongside and, at their next scheduled break, moved past. The Lizard had been blissfully quiet for a while. Somewhere around mile eight he piped up, intent on sharing his views on the state of the US Nation whilst revealing his political stance to be just to the right of Atilla the Hun. Barack Obama, he informed me loudly, was an implant, part of a brilliant Al Qaida plot to destabilise the Unaaded Staydes of Amerrca. Obama’s ploy was to empower every freak minority in the country before finally ceding control to Muslim extremists who would nuke the state of Israel ‘within weeks’. Last straw, meet the camel’s back. I could, perhaps should, have taken him to task, offered an alternative world view, used reasoned argument to outline the hopes we in the West held for a future under a more sensitive, culturally aware America. Or I could just as easily have hauled his scaly hide off the road and battered his bloody carcass into the soft heart of the hungry peat bog. A criminal waste of precious energy perhaps, but terribly satisfying none-the-less. I was staring down the barrel of another six hours of this babbling nonsense unless I did something right now. So I did the only reasonable thing I could do under the circumstances; I dropped a cog and kicked on.
I once ran the last few miles of Beachy Head with an man suffering from aischrologia; but once I realised he wasn't swearing at me and his obscenities were his way of getting himself up and down the Seven Sisters, we became friends.
That you coped with an ultra, and the company of a man who seems to have embraced the world view of General Jack D. Ripper, is even more of a tribute to your strength and stamina.
I would advise against strolling around the docks in Nice in a leather microskirt, though. People might mistake your intentions.
Head down, breathing hard I upped a gear to reach six minutes thirty kilometre pace and stayed there. Slowly, steadily the Lizard fell behind. I could hear him chuntering away to the hedgerows, his voice receding as I pushed on. I felt a pang of guilt as I heard Antonio’s measured tones greet him. I was certain Antonio’s more genial nature and natural curiosity would overcome any desire to commit Repticide on this long and lonely road. Fairly certain anyway ...

I continued to eat every twenty minutes or so. The fruit-based power bars were delicious, as was the Malt Loaf. I sipped religiously from my drinks bottle between water stations. By mile ten things were definitely hotting up. I’d reeled in (incredibly slowly) a number of stragglers, chatting to them as I eased past. Aside from these fellow runners there was little or no sign of human life. Bridges crossed crystal clear streams meandering off the adjacent hills. Fields watched silently as I chugged by embracing the solitude. Although I train with others most weekends I've learned to love the loneliness of these long-distance journeys. I started to think about Mile Thirteen and my trusty rucksack resting there laden with goodies. My legs felt fine yet I knew I’d be needing an ibuprofen in a while, plus I could do with snaffling a banana or two to help dissipate the inevitable lactic acid pooling in my muscles.

Water stations came and went. I was thrilled to see they still had a few full bottles for us, the wonderful volunteers clapping as I passed.
‘Many behind you?’
‘Half a dozen or so.’
Mountains lounged on the edge of my vision, regal onlookers observing this parade of colourful ants scurrying along the dark, winding roads. Bereft of rain for some days the fields glowed barley-wheat blonde, grasses bobbing in the gently dying zephyr. All the while the sun beamed down, chasing the cool morning air into the shadows.

Mile twelve loomed with a surprise in store. There on a slight ridge in the road, right next to the black-and-white mile marker tie-wrapped to a telegraph pole, sat a trestle table upon which sat my purple rucksack. I’d almost missed it, my gaze drawn into the distance by the tips of a series of impressive peaks. I stopped to wipe the now slightly heavier sweat from my brow and took a picture, catching sight of the table as I stowed by phone. Slightly bemused I sauntered across. It felt surreal seeing this out here, in the middle of nowhere, having dropped it into a large black plastic dustbin in a hotel function room some two hours ago.

First order of business was a change of shirt. I peeled off the sodden RC vest, folding it carefully with my running number upper-most before pulling on the blissfully cool, dry Two Oceans technical top. Another thumbs up for my planning here; the fresh shirt was white, ideal for running through the hottest part of the day. By now the sun was directly overhead and shining for all its worth. I gulped down two Ibuprofen followed by Suzie’s Little Helper, a tiny grenade of energy drink that she’d assured me would give me lift for 'up to five hours'. Warm salty urine might, by comparison, be quite tasty but I gratefully swallowed my revulsion with the last drop before looking for something to distract my taste buds. I fished out a bagel and peeled off the slightly tacky tissue paper, wolfing down the peanut butter and jam filled segment. Delicious! Rucksack mounted, water bottle replenished and a banana clutched in one hand I turned to face the road again just as Robert Shaw dragged his fingernails down the Amity school blackboard; the Lizard! Bollocks. I’d tarried barely a minute or two but it had been enough.
‘Hey there! Takin’ in the scenery?’
Mortified I could find no pithy remark. Instead I offered a weak smile, snapped a shot of his back as he shuffled by and set off after him, cursing my misfortune.

We chugged along, shoulder to shoulder, without a word. Perhaps my reticence to engage had finally pierced the reptilian republican’s skin. No matter, for what we saw rounding the next bend in the road fair took our breath away. There sat a picture postcard scene: a death-still lake beneath gargantuan hills, brown, beige, green and gold symmetry reflected off a long flat mirror. The Lizard refrained from staining the moment with inanity, letting out a whoosh of air in appreciation of the view. This was Lough Inaugh and the Twelve Bens (also known as the Twelve Pins); simply stunning. I snapped a picture then noticed the mile marker set at a jaunty angle. That got my attention alright.

We’d reached Cloonnacartan having bagged the first of three consecutive half marathons in a shade over two hours twenty. Part of ‘getting my Ultra head on’ was to break the race into three parts. A half marathon is a mentally manageable distance, especially at a relatively easy pace. One gone the next begun, it was a case of ‘as you were’, another two-twenty-ish effort would deliver a sub four-forty-five marathon, perfect launch-pad for the last assault. I read the bold black and white typeface: ‘Connemara International Marathon - Full Marathon Start’ and swallowed hard.

Half a mile later we hit an impossibly long, superbly straight road leading away into the hazy horizon. Halfway along what turned out to be a two kilometre stretch from Finnisglin to Letterbreackaun sat a lone port-a-loo. Looking like a cheap replica of the TARDIS the blue plastic box leaned precariously across the road's edge. Next to it sat an abandoned table surrounded by hundreds of plastic bottles. It looked like the aftermath of an alien abduction; there should be people here, yet aside from a few colourful dots (runners) in the distance we were alone. The Lizard wandered off towards some clumpy grass and let out a loud yelp. For one unkind moment I thought he’d sunk up to his waist, taken by the peat bog to save us from his babble. Instead he stood up and yelled: ‘Hey! Some of these baatles are full!’
He’d found a batch of water bottles, un-touched other than to be chucked into the long brown grass where they lay like translucent dinosaur eggs. I helped him scoop them up and lay them on the table for the few runners still behind us. I regretted my animosity towards the fellow. Clearly his heart was in the right place even if his political sensibilities were misguided and his jaw incapable of rest. Within ten minutes my ire was restored, the flow of verbal diarrhoea increasingly noxious and seemingly without end. Once again I pulled away, swearing a silent oath that I would not see him again today.

Eyes fixed on the horizon I tried a little meditation: Pace yourself ... bend your knees ... keep a straight back ... hydrate ... watch your form, calorie in-take ... relax; enjoy the ride .... my mental mantra repeated Chris McDougall’s advice over and over. Before long I had the road to myself once more, digging into my second Half of the morning with renewed relish. With so much wild beauty in every direction I'd not tire of running through this fabulous land.

Past Tooreenacoona the road began to rise until, breathless and pouring with sweat, I reached the crossroads at Kylemore. Ray O’Connors instructions from a lifetime ago echoed in my head.
‘What do you do at Maam Cross?’
The chanted reply: ‘Turn Right!’
‘And what do you do at the Lissoughter junction?’
More voices this time: ‘Turn Right!’
‘And when you reach the junction at Kylemore?’
All: ‘TURN RIGHT!’
I was glad of that now for I was staring at a baroque montage of road signs angled to all points of the compass. I turned right, upwards ever upwards past a stone-built hotel where a smattering of ruddy-faced folk decked out in summer sweaters applauded. From the sharp turn at Kylemore and on to Creagha the road got seriously steep and here, for the first time, my legs started whingeing. My calves ached with the climbing, albeit modest work by my Sunday standards, and my hips felt sore. My ‘cool clean’ shirt was already heavy with sweat and my achilles felt tight as Captain Tom’s money belt. At 20 degrees Celcius we were well below Cape Town's brutal boiler. I took comfort in the knowledge that I’d had it far hotter and tougher than this. I pressed on, checking my stride to keep everything nice and tight. Getting out of shape expends energy you can’t afford. Staying upright and avoiding ‘body wobbles’ (I’m sure there’s a technical term) saves energy, key to my survival strategy. Remarkably I continued to catch and pass other runners. Many were taking regular walk breaks, munching on snacks or slurping on drinks. This gave me a real boost and my confidence in reaching Check Point Charlie before the deadline grew.

At 35 klicks, just past Bunowen, the road levelled out before the long, steady descent towards Killary Harbour. I relaxed, embracing the gentle slope towards the fjord (there’s some debate as to whether Killary was formed by glaciers, and therefore not strictly a fjord, but frankly that’s too anal even for me. It’s a fjord). The water called to me, a siren song of cool embrace to sooth my burning legs. I shook this off; there’d be no swimming here. Instead I turned my attention to the two ladies just ahead of me. They'd been coming back to me over the past mile or so. I huffed along in their shadow for a few minutes before one of them slowed to a walk, causing her companion to check back. I kept going, flicking a handful of sweat from my forehead into the roadside gorse once I’d reached safe distance. My legs were tightening by the stride now. I could see a water station just ahead and I could make out an assortment of bags and packages on a trestle table next to the mile 22 marker … and there they were, my ancient running shoes, parked solemnly next to some carefully labelled packages. Relieved I plundered their contents, restocking my water bottle and taking a long draught on the flat coke before stowing supplies in my rucksack. Moyleman extolled the restorative virtues of flat coke during the Two Oceans, and I gulped down the warm, sickly-sweet fluid hoping he was right. For a split second I considered wedging the loyal runners into my pack but this was no time for sentiment. They’d served me well, carried me over many a mile; it was time to say farewell. I set off with a last respectful glance at the sad, empty shoes and turned my attention to the road ahead. On, on.

The two ladies had passed me whilst I’d loaded up. One was clearly much stronger than the other and I sensed an imminent parting of the ways there. To my left the ground dropped sharply towards the dark waters of the inland sea. Some of the high gorse on my right cast a merciful roadside shadow so I risked the heavy camber to take respite from the sun. Once again I caught and passed the women. A quick glance confirmed that one was indeed red-faced and blowing hard. The other was upright, relaxed and looked horribly full of running. Five minutes later it was my turn to slow. My legs were unhappy with the constant down-hill pounding. Tired and hot I’d lost some form and had been over-striding for the last mile or so, ramming my full bodyweight through my knees and heels with each heavy footfall. I adjusted, shortened my stride and tried to keep my landing foot directly below me. This helped but inevitably my pace dropped. Soon I could hear strong, fast foot-falls coming up behind me but I didn’t look back. I guessed it was the stronger of the two women and so it proved as she sailed past me, flaxen hair flying as she pressed on.

My Garmin flashed up 40k. I could see the rooftops of Leenan, the comely village hosting our 26.2 mile check point and the start of the Half Marathon race. I was OK for time so I took a walk break. ‘Only for a minute’ I promised myself, yet one rolled into two as my hammered muscles relaxed and my lungs celebrated with long deep draughts of warm air. I flipped the rucksack off my shoulder and took another slug of coke followed by water and a couple of jelly babies. As I rummaged around in the increasingly unpleasant depths of the bag I realised that my RC shirt had soaked everything, wreaking havoc with the carefully-wrapped chunks of bagel. I shook my head, sending a spray of warm sweat across the tarmac. Come on old son, let’s get across that line and sort this lot out.
Gripping stuff, Sweder. Sounds like the absolute antithesis of a big city marathon.

One thing I'm not clear on -- were you run / walking from the off, or just pacing yourself slowly?
(27-05-2010 07:53 AM)marathondan Wrote: [ -> ]One thing I'm not clear on -- were you run / walking from the off, or just pacing yourself slowly?

sweder Wrote:My training, such as it was, included several runs at seven-minute kilometre pace, taking one-minute walk breaks every ten minutes or so. Now we were into the race proper no-one else in our group was doing this and, considering we were in the best (coolest) part of the day I changed strategy.

I didn't mention this again did I? Too much editing, sorry. Frankly the thought of getting reeled in by my scaly friend kept me on my toes.
I took my first walk break around 40k. They were rather more frequent from then on ... but you'll have to wait for the final installment to hear about that. It's done, just need to review and post tonight.
Woe to You Oh Earth and Sea
for the Devil sends the beast with wrath
because he knows the time is short
Let him who have understanding reckon the number of the Beast
for it is a human number


Number of the Beast, Iron Maiden

By the time the long road out of Derrynasligaun reached the outskirts of Leenan we were running parallel to Killay Harbour. I was hot and tired; my legs belonged to a Tin Man in desperate need of some WD40 and I had a permanent thirst. The wheels weren’t off but they were a tad wobbly. Lady number two (the struggler) caught and passed me. I glanced down at my shirt to see a nasty red stain spreading across the right side of my chest. Either I’d been shot or ...oh no: Nipple down! Nipple down! I scrambled the Vaseline, smearing a great dob of viscous white grease across the raw teat before treating it’s as yet unmolested neighbour. Did I mention I was hot? Or that my legs hurt?

The good news was that according to my sweat-splashed Garmin I was just a few hundred metres from completing the second of my three half-marathons. I’d taken a few walk breaks in the last mile or so, taking in the scenery without the horribly loud, rasped breathing or the ugly slap-slap-slap of my too-flat feet. Around the next bend lay redemption; Checkpoint Charlie, the pivotal twenty-six point two mile marker. Not one but three tables nestled by the entrance to a beautiful stone bridge, attended by what appeared to be a large, rather boisterous family. One of the youngsters came up to me holding a plastic beaker filled with orange squash. I took it gratefully and offered what I hoped was a smile but what was in all probability a terrible grimace bound to give the poor mite nightmares.
I came to a shuffling stop and checked my watch. Four hours Forty-two minutes. Someone asked me for my race number and I realised it was bundled up in my rucksack. I shrugged the pack off my shoulders and dove in, pulling out a horrendous mixture of crumbling bagel, sticky tissue paper, peanut butter, jam and sodden, food-stained Running Commentary shirt. Yuk. The shirt was still wringing wet. I unfurled the offensive garment, showing the battered race number to an official. Then I had an idea. I’d planned to swap shirts back again on the long climb before the finish (when I’d certainly be walking). The idea of wriggling back into this foul rag was abhorrent. But ... if I tied the shirt to the handle of my rucksack (with the number showing for the benefit of any checkers along the route) the sun, still blazing merrily overhead, would dry it out. Genius.

This moment of housekeeping brilliance lifted my spirits. I drained the last of the (flat) coke and rummaged for my last-but-one banana. Fair to say this was in poor shape, slightly squishy, the skin blotchy and misshapen; a bit like yours truly. I chomped on the battered fruit and with a cheery wave and a much friendlier smile I was away. Immediately across the bridge the route turned sharp right. I followed the road past an enticing pub, pushing thoughts of a cool pint in the stone cold shadows to back of my broiling head. The road climbed at an alarming rate, a vertical grey snake disappearing up, up and away over the horizon. Harsh, people, very bloody harsh. I trotted at first, keeping my steps short and sharp. As my pace dropped below nine minutes thirty/ Km I realised I could walk faster whilst resting my increasingly sore legs, so I did.

My ‘striding boldly’ pace improved to around eight minutes forty-five, not too shabby for an 'at rest' rate. I still couldn’t see the summit of this long and winding hill, yet I felt certain by the time I got there I’d be ready to resume running. Unless of course my ailing legs completely seized … My brain worked feverishly, trying to calculate pace, times, breaks. Was seven hours thirty still on the cards? Right, 4:42 for the first two halves, that leaves (counts on fingers, scratches sweaty scalp) ... two hours forty-five or so. Walk a couple of miles, maybe stop for a pee (I didn't, not even once on whole darned voyage) average's likely to drop a bit ...

My head hurt. I pulled alongside a tough looking hombre in camouflage kit. I saw right away he was in pain. He looked across, eyebrows raised, offering one of those friendly smiles that looks like a Death Mask.
‘Alright?’ I offered
‘Strugglin’. Leg’s gone’ (I glanced down but of course they were both still there. The left one was unnaturally stiff and dragging slightly).
‘Had some injuries in training, thought I’d give it a go. Knee went a couple of miles back.’
I confided that I too was struggling, but found that upping my rate I 'felt better about walking'. He matched my stride and we marched up the hill like a couple of squaddies returning to camp slightly late after a night on the town; bruised, knackered but happy enough. We exchanged running histories; this was his second Connemarathon. He’d hoped to break six hours thirty but would be pleased just to get to the end before nightfall. I told him my own story and his eyes got rather big when I got to the part about upgrading a couple of weeks ago.

The hill, (just over two kilometres long) took us fifteen minutes to complete. At the top I felt OK to jog on. My new-found friend thanked me for picking him up and wished me well on my quest. My legs were still tight but with plenty of fluids taken onboard I felt pretty good. The key thing was to keep moving and to my great delight I started passing more runners. I noticed one of them had a different coloured race number, meaning he was most likely taking part in the Marathon. He called out as I passed. ‘Ultra! Go man, hardcore!’ That gave me such a boost I actually looked like a runner for a good thirty seconds.

At mile twenty-nine I assessed my posture and stride patterns; not pretty. My upright stance had melted into a slouch, my short sharp stride now a scraping, slappy shuffle yet incredibly I wasn’t wobbling from side to side which I put down to keeping my knees slightly bent. OK, aesthetically this might conjure images of the late great Max Wall (good job I wasn’t wearing leggings) but hey, it’s not a beauty contest, right? Probably just as well. The bent knees thing, another gift from Born To Run, helps alleviate stress on the lower back, a real problem for me during the Two Oceans and subsequently on most long runs.

Somewhere around the fifty K mark the road started to rise perceptibly. I ran for a while but after a series of tough, twisting bends took another walk break. My legs were aching pretty much constantly (have I mentioned the leg thing at all? OK, just checking ...) but I was managing to shut those pesky alarm signals off and occupy my mind with happier thoughts, such as 'wow, look at those mountains! or Hmm, she's got a rather nice bottom, or ... well, never mind. It was time to brave that last banana, see if I could stave off imminent limb seizure. Once again I performed the awkward Reverse Heimlich required to shift the decrepit rucksack off my back. My RC shirt was a good deal drier and I allowed myself a small self-congratulatory whoop. I thrust my hand into the dark recess of the bag, fingers scrabbling over all manner of icky nastiness until they found the mangled fruit. This felt like some deadly right of passage, like the hysterical Treebeast scene in Flash Gordon where Timothy Dalton’s ultra-camp Prince Barin oversees the unfortunate demise of erstwhile Blue Peter presenter Peter Duncan in a bizarre macho pissing contest featuring a lethal stinging claw hiding in an old tree trunk. I’m not joking and no, I wasn’t tripping at this point; check the link if you don’t believe me. I drew my arm out slowly to reveal my prize, a blackened, limp appendage that could barely have looked less appetising if it had been covered in flies.

Back in the real world finding a tiny blemish on an otherwise pristine banana induces shrieks of alarm and fleeing terror. Fifty kilometres into a hot, hard road race this ugly battered mush was manna from heaven gulped down with all the relish of a Gastronaut sampling the rarest truffle. I even smacked my lips. The pleasure was fleeting and soon I was hunched into another climb, taking yet another walk-break to catch my breath in the heat of the afternoon. My legs un-cramped enough to let me run as I embraced the down slopes. Changing stride patterns helped shift the pain, though the Vulcan Mind Trick I’d deployed was starting to wear off.

Six hours in, just before Griggins Bridge, I came across a couple of Ultra runners leaning against a low dry stone wall. The lady had her shoe and sock off and the chap seemed to be applying some kind of lotion to her foot.
‘You guys OK?’ I asked. They looked up, smiling. The lady answered in a soft Irish lilt.
‘Oh yes, I have a skin condition. Just need to apply ointment now and again.’
‘Okay. D’you have plenty of water? Food?’ (a bold enquiry considering the horrors lurking in my sweat-soaked back pack).
‘We’re good, but thank you.’
I rumbled on, sipping on bottled water and munching on Jelly Babies by now sickly sweet and slightly tacky. Another mini-hill at fifty-five kilometres had me huffing and puffing, sucking air that felt like it just came out of a hot oven. I walked 'till the road dropped once more. I felt really rather warm yet I knew I’d faced much worse and come through. I had none of the stomach cramps I’d suffered in Cape Town and with plenty of fluid to hand I felt confident I’d be OK. Still, I was moved to tweet: 56 k. We’re in the fiery belly of the Beast.

At last, after more walk-run shambling, passing half a dozen fellow runners including a few more Marathoners, I reached the junction at Moneenmore. Slightly delirious I staggered past the turn across the bridge and on to a deserted garage forecourt. I looked around and saw a few people lining the bridge. They all seemed to be watching me to see what I’d do next. Realising my error I stumbled back towards them, grinning sheepishly. They returned my smile, clapping politely as I crossed the bridge. The road stretched away and off in the distance it rose between two great hills; The Hell Of The West, the two mile climb before the final blessed run-in. I ran on, now at around seven minute thirty kilometre pace, determined to keep running until I reached the start of the hill. Once there I slowed to a walk, standing tall and marching rather than ambling. This took me past a few more run-walkers, including incredibly some Half Marathoners who appeared to be out for a Sunday stroll. Every now and then they’d see the number (still on my back) and I’d hear them speak in hushed tones to their companions; ‘Ultra runner; wow.’ I felt incredibly proud to be spoken of in such reverent tones, perhaps even a little bashful considering I’d walked for a good three miles or so since Leenan. I strode and drank and munched and marched. As the road took me higher into the hills the views around me became ever more spectacular. They were as nothing compared to the glorious vista laid before me at the summit; a winding trail of roadway snaking down through fields of gold bordered by magnificent mountains under a Big Sky. In the near distance a clump of dark green trees surrounded a lone multi-storey building; the hotel at Maam Cross. The end was literally in sight.

My heart leapt. For the first time in a while it occurred to me I was going to make it. I glanced at my Garmin and nearly cried out when I realised I would not only finish but, barring a collapse of Devon Loch proportions, would do so well within the allotted time. Once more I hoiked the pack off my back, this time to untie my RC top. The black shirt was perfectly dry, though there’s no denying it wreaked of stale sweat. No matter; I wanted to cross the line in ‘corporate colours’, stuffing my Two Oceans shirt into my bag before setting off on the long, gentle descent into heaven. My legs felt like hardened concrete, every step spiked with tight, niggling pain. I'd managed that pain really well up to now. This last of three Half Marathons had been a real slog, brutal at times, yet despite the continual stream of complaint from my legs, hips, back and chest I’d managed to enjoy every step. This was in part due to a conscious effort to reject these signals, to shut them off. As the messages came in from various fronts my brain simply filed them in the tray marked ‘not required on voyage’ and told everyone to ‘carry on’. Somewhere in his book Chris McDougall talks about dealing with pain and self-doubt, rising above it by focusing on style and posture. For whatever reason that worked for me. Those last few miles, from the top of The Hell Of The West to the finish at Maam Cross, were impossibly painful, yet a part of me barely noticed. I was basking in the glory of completing the challenge way before I crossed the line. From a kilometre out people lined the road; finishers clutched their hard-earned medals, friends and family scanned the road for signs of loved ones, all clapping and cheering the procession of half, full and Ultra marathoners heading for home. My yellow Ultra number afforded me extra claps and cheers, and again I felt a swell of pride in my tired soaked chest.

At last I was round the final bend – or is that finally round the bend? The beautiful finish line, red banner limp in the still air, beyond it a familiar figure beaming the world’s widest smile. As I crossed the line, arms held aloft, Ray O’Connor stepped forward to shake my hand. ‘Well done! Well done!’ he beamed. I grinned back at him, shaking my head as the enormity of what I'd achieved started to sink in.

Minutes later I sat, still slightly dazed, perched on the high curbstone, medal round my neck, fresh bottle of water in my hand, letting the sweat drip off my nose to splash into the dirt. A couple of girls chatted right next to me but I couldn’t hear what they were saying. I gazed dreamily across the road and fields towards the rising shoulders of the Maumturks as Phil Lynott’s distinctive drawl filled my head. Emerald has always been one of my favourite Thin Lizzy tracks. Sat there in the roadside dust after the heat of my very own battle, the day cooling around me, the lyrics held new meaning.

Down from the glen came the marching men
With their shields and their swords
To fight the fight they believed to be right
Overthrow the overlords

To the town where there was plenty
They brought plunder, swords and flame
When they left the town was empty
Children would never play again

From their graves I heard the fallen
Above the battle cry
By that bridge near the border
There were many more to die

Then onward over the mountain
And outward towards the sea
They had come to claim the Emerald
Without it they could not leave


I’d claimed my Emerald. Now it was time to leave.
Time for a beer, maybe two.
I left alone, my mind was blank,
I needed time to think, to get the memories from my mind...


Wow, not sure where to start on this. In my experience, the last hour of a marathon is a make-or-break, men-from-boys, sheep-from-goats, torturous cross-examination of the soul. What it seems you've done here is willingly extend that to 3+ hours, in the interests of furthering your scientific research into your own emotional limits.

The good news is that this invasive procedure actually enhances the subject being studied.

I take off my hat, and all other forms of headgear, to you.

And I think the report can be filed in the top drawer, as well. Wink
Sweder, I have so enjoyed reading every word of your magnificent race. You make it so real; like I'm running right beside you (thank goodness I wasn't!). I still say you're a machine and in a league of your own. My hat is definitely off to you as well! I stand in awe.


Suzie
Thank you.
SP reminded me that I've (inevitably) missed a few details. I've invited him to chip in as they may sound better coming from him. There's also more to tell; the assault on Croagh Patrick is an epic all its own, and there are some great photos from that day too. I'll add this later.

My overriding sense is of an adventure that I observed rather than took part in. There was a kind of surreal stream running through the weekend. None of it really makes sense in the cold light of day. It sounds churlish and arrogant to suggest it was easy, but pain aside it really wasn't that bad. It certainly laid to rest the spectre of my Two Oceans agonies, and has given me pause for thought on my running future. 'Adventure running' - a clumsy term that I'll no doubt improve upon - seems to be the (long) way forward for me.

I mention Born To Run a few times. I cannot over-emphasise the affect this book had on my Connemarathon experience. Had I not read it in the weeks before I've no doubt I would not have completed the Ultra. I owe a huge debt of thanks to Antonio too. If we'd pursuaded him to drop the Ultra and find a way into the Half I never would have had this opportunity. He remained resolute in the face of incredulity. 'Do not underestimate the determination of a quiet man.' Gracias Amigo.
It's a long way to the top
If you wanna rock 'n' roll

ACDC

On Sunday night the rehydration committee sat in session 'til the Witching Hour. Finishers' shirts, photos and trading tales of our racing day were de rigueur as the Guinness flowed. We ate at a pub two doors down from our hotel where the steaks were as good as any I’ve seen. Mine was inhaled, devoured with a rapacious fervor that alarmed nearby diners yet worryingly seemed to delight our waitress. After nursing a last pint alone with my thoughts I called it a night. As I slid from my bar stool it seemed rigour mortis had taken hold in my legs. My painfully slow, stiff-limbed ascent of the hotel stairs was a thing of cruel ugliness.

[Image: 31781_1427632644851_1053853244_1237934_494860_n.jpg]

Next morning we met for breakfast. The descent from my room was no easier. My quads were raw mince, calves and hamstrings as tight as Will Scarlett’s drawn bowstring. My back throbbed and I was generally battered and sore. A generous full Irish repaired some of the damage yet I still had no idea if I’d be able to take part in the day’s planned activities. With M away to Galway in search of shops EG, SP, Down-in-One, Suzie and I were set to scale Croagh Patrick, a climb of some 2,500 feet over 10 kilometres (round trip) of rough terrain and, for the final push, up treacherous loose scree. I bade Antonio a fond farewell, my fellow Ultranista headed home via Galway and Dublin. Read his race report here. The sun had his hat on once more, beaming down out of a clear blue sky. There was a breeze of sorts that took the edge off but it was still pretty warm for mountain climbing.

I made it, but at some cost to the nails on my two longest toes, since turned black, even now still hanging on by the merest thread. Once I got some warm blood pumping through my legs they responded, but I’d be misleading you if I said the two hour climb wasn’t brutal. Thankfully Andy had travelled this path before and recommended we borrow stout staffs from the base camp café. These proved invaluable in both directions. On the ascent I leaned heavily on the long stick, using it to find purchase where my feet had none. I started the descent gingerly, concerned that should the scree suddenly yield I might start a small avalanche. After ten minutes of prancing about I cast caution to the wind and started bounding down the steep slope. To my delight I found the rocks gave way to a degree then stopped, allowing me to spring forward onto the other foot and repeat the process, creating a sort of surf-slide hybrid action. I whooped a few times as I slalomed my way down the mountain, grinning madly at the poor souls still clambering up the slippery trails. When the shale gave way a little too readily I planted the staff behind me in the manner of a crazy land-locked Gondolier. Suzie had started her return to base some twenty minutes before me and I caught her around halfway down. We finished together, perching outside the café to share an ice-cream, squinting back up the low-lying trails to see if we could spot our companions as we ruminated on the pleasures of lazing in the afternoon sun.

I snapped a few shots (via phone cam) which I’ve posted below. The views from the summit were breathtaking. Out across County Mayo, back towards the Maumturks and away across Clew Bay, where whelkers of human and avian extraction strode the mudflats side by side in search of supper. Sadly my paltry 2.0 megapixel lense does not do the vistas justice. You can read more about this and a perspective on the half marathon route here on Andy’s blog.
Well worth a visit I assure you.

LtoR: SP; Not half way; Still a ways to go; Pilgrim's Shadow; Author at rest; Andy close; Andy closer; View from the top; SuzieQ
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